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My Poems Thom writing

A tale of motherhood

It begins like a Tempest,

With a storm at sea.

I do feel like adulthood

is over rated.

It’s a palette of feelings:

Categories
activism Buddhism Yoga

The Modern Bodhisattva

bodhisattva

“Hands of Compassion” by Mayumi Oda.

In these challenging times we get to see a lot of people – especially women – rising and standing up for their voices to be heard. After decades of feminism, western women have become strong and powerful. “The fight isn’t over” I hear some of you say. Sure. But it’s been a long way.

Sadly I have met a lot of western mamas who told me how much they wish they had more time to do yoga. More time to do art… but what about being yoga?

Categories
creativity Finished Objects Knitting My paintings My Sketch Book

“You know the day destroys the night”..

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I have been painting a lot lately… To unwind and center myself after some pretty hectic days, trying to keep up with Boy’s home-ed schedule.

Categories
Animals creativity My paintings My Sketch Book Thom

Owl mysteries…

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Sometimes, there is no time for Whys or How(l)s.

Owls just appear. Suddenly.

Categories
Buddhism writing Yoga

Making peace with reality

Green Tara

In Buddhism, Green Tara is often referred to as the women’s ally. Her mantra is : oṃ tāre tu tāre ture soha.

Tārā also embodies many of the qualities of feminine principle. She is known as the Mother of Mercy and Compassion. She is the source, the female aspect of the universe, which gives birth to warmth, compassion and relief from bad karma as experienced by ordinary beings in cyclic existence. She engenders, nourishes, smiles at the vitality of creation, and has sympathy for all beings as a mother does for her children. As Green Tārā she offers succor and protection from all the unfortunate circumstances one can encounter within the samsaric world” 

Wikipedia.

I highly recommend to everyone – especially women – to memorise it, and repeat it to yourself whenever you can, especially in those moments when fear or anxiety arise or when one needs strength or courage. It could also be written down on a piece of paper and kept in your pocket.


I used to think that if I could ever have a superpower, I’d like mine to be invisibility. As a child, teenager and young adult, I used to imagine how much fun it would be to become invisible whenever I wanted to.

Categories
creativity My Poems Thom

the colours of my soul

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The colours of my soul

spread on the paper

dripping through that brush

expanding at the contact

of water in wet paper.

the brush slides

my soul colours spread

themselves, mixing with

one another.

it’s a dance, it’s a rythm

it’s a song.

Categories
My Poems Thom Videos

I shed a tear

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As I watch you play

Your favourite seaside game

On a windy day

I see, what a shame,

I wasn’t even watching.

At the time, back then

I was just busy talking

Hiding in my den

In my head, my thoughts

I didn’t see the beauty

Happening in front me.

Luckily Tara filmed it

And now I got to watch 

A tiny part of my life

That had somehow escaped me…

Watching myself not watching

Missed moments of you growing

While still being there.

Being physically right here

But my head is somewhere else

And the sad thing is…

I bet it will happen again.

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Categories
My Poems Uncategorized

The year of the Horse (and I’m a horse!)

Sciatica

Heart Ache

Bulged disc.

Yoga

What the heck?

Back twist.

Arnica

Seized neck

Prolapsed disc.

Old Micra

Rusty brake

No fix.

New Micra

Rattling snake

Bad Clutch disc.

Supernova

Of mistakes

Financial risk…

Alma

Matters on deck

and improvised tricks.

image

“A rainbow greyhound, as they are in Floorland”.

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Uncategorized

Creativity as a Daily Practice…

“Life is a journey, not a destination” – Ralph Waldo Emerson. Our world has been turned upside down recently, as we moved house… We left an old cottage in the woods for a more urban dwelling in a very quiet town on the edge of the forest. We had to readjust a little bit to our new surroundings, and now we are pretty much settled in. We had to change our habits and a house move was a great opportunity to get rid of a lot of our possessions that were just sitting around. I believe that if we have too many things, then these things end up owning you as you will need a bigger house to accommodate all of your belongings, therefore you will need more money and will have less time for yourself, and your dear ones… I  was worried that our cat Henry was going to suffer the move as he was so used to living in our old neighbourhood where he was thoroughly enjoying a busy social life of his own, with some of the neighbours, people and cats alike. He was invited for dinner to a few houses a few times a week, eating with his feline friends and their people! I’m sure he is sadly missed! So I was worried that he would struggle to live in a town, even though we have a private garden surrounded by other gardens… He is so sociable… But soon he made friends with another cat, had a few fights with the hot locals and has already seduced a few human ladies…. I have caught my neighbour feeding him cat biscuits the day before yesterday. image

His Royal Highness Henry the 1st.

Thom and I have been immersed in The story of Peter Pan, reading a new chapter of the book every night… image

We watched a beautiful Peter Pan broadway musical and we had great discussions about the story, went to a pirate event by the sea front, had a boat ride around Eastbourne’s harbour and Thom enjoyed dressing up as a pirate a lot… Although I thoroughly enjoyed reading J.M. Barrie’s book, which gave me a deeper understanding of the character of Captain Hook, captain Paul Watson remains my favourite pirate ;)

I have been struggling with sciatica for 9 months now, and things got worse a couple of weeks ago when I did my back on top of it… After 3 days stuck in bed I ended up being just about able to make my way to the osteopath,  who said she would have rather seen me 9 months ago… So it was time for me to surrender to stillness… Stillness is a great place for me to make felted animals from…

imageHere are 2 of the animals I made :)

imageThom called the blue tit Mr Nice

imageAnd this is Lady Nice, which I made for Thom’s birthday but I gave her a makeover…

And I made another owl for the birthday of a special little girl who turned 7 last week…

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Thom and I have a great project on the go, we have exactly the same sketchbook and we do a double page spread everyday. Whatever we feel like doing. So far it’s been water colours, drawing and glitter for both of us. It’s nice to sit down together at the coffee table and start our daily creation :)

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imageYesterday’s paintings

imageToday’s creations… (You may have noticed, owl is one of our totem animals :)

We have also been doing some action painting in our new patio, which I found to be very therapeutic! Thom really enjoyed mixing all the colours together to create new ones and we were drumming with our brushes on a large sheet of paper pegged on a laundry line… It was grand… We ended up experimenting holding the brushes with our toes, and then just walking in paint and all over big sheets of paper rolled out on the floor… It got messy, but it was fun. I think process art is definitely the way to go, for children and adults. If we are not attached to produce something “nice” then we can thoroughly enjoy the creative process, the release of tension and blocked emotions and letting go of inhibitions that hold us back. Plus for kids experimenting helps them to understand better how things work, build their confidence and problem solving skills (along with free play and good stories to feed their imagination… ) Well to my humble experience anyway…

:)

What about you? How do you nurture your creativity? Do you manage to make time for it?

I definitely feel happier when I do :)

Speak soon,

Noemie.

Categories
Uncategorized

5 years

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA
Thom, when he was a few days old… I wrote about it here at the time.

Exactly five years ago, I was just embarking on a journey, a journey of self – discovery, though I didnt realise it at the time. Something beautiful happened, but not the way I had planned. I was in for a shock.

For the first time in my life, something went wrong, out of my control, like a train coming off the tracks. Something beyond my control happened, to show me that being in control is an illusion.

You’re not in control, ultimately.

My son is the living reminder of this. From the second he was born this is the lesson he has been relentlessly presenting to me, on a daily basis for the last five years.

Before him, I thought I knew myself. I thought I was quite evolved spiritually and I thought I was a very flexible person… then he arrived and turned my world upside down and I realised that I was a complete control freak. I was flexible because I had organised my life the way I wanted it to be… It’s easy to be flexible when you have carefully constructed your own selfish reality!

One of the first lessons I learned : It’s not about me or what I want, or how I would like things to be. Being able to go with the flow while not holding onto the past or worrying about the future is a good start… but that’s just a start. Hold on tight! It’s a bumpy ride but it is a true gift.

Parenting has brought me to face the greatest challenges of my life and I realised that I am (and he is) much more resilient than I ever imagined.

I was the kind of young adult who didn’t want to have any children. I was dead against it and even considered getting ‘sterilised’! I only wanted to go on adventures, my camera around my neck. Now I’m glad I changed my mind and I’m glad that I had the opportunity to embark on this crazy ride. It’s a great way to sort out your own shit as it brings everything up to the surface for you to look at it. It’s not always pretty, but once you have seen it, examined it, re-played it and prepared yourself to let go of it, it’s a wonderful feeling. You feel ready to move on, to embrace the next challenge that’s about to be thrown in your face… It has been relentless, like a proper jedi training, but if you accept to fully embrace the challenge and face it head on, it’s a powerful opportunity for personal growth and self development.

Today he is five, and I’m just at the beginning of the ladder. One baby step at a time. He just looked at the picture of himself above and said: “Oh that’s me when I was a baby, when I just came out of your tummy”

– Yes I said,

The he rubbed his little hands on my tummy and said :

“Look, I think there might be another baby in your tummy, and it’s a little girl!”

Although I acknowledge that it’s been an incredible journey and that the last five years have been an incredible ride, I don’t have the pretense to imagine surviving if I have my life turned upside down again… Now my selfishness longs for peace, calm, quiet…
and I wouldn’t mind trying to have a little bit of my life my own way again, just for a little while!

Have a good night,

Noemie.